Diaries of a rockstar girl

I need to forget you but I couldn’t erase everything yet I hate myself just at the fact that I let you go I dressed in the clothes that you liked I stand alone at the place you left me In case you come back to me, in case you come back to me Even if the world ends, my dear, can you hear me? Even if it’s the end, please smile, only you This melody sounds sadder especially today I love this lyrics . It doesn't relate to my life but it just feels sad . The fact that someone you love , leave you behind , I really know how it feel like . I just hoping that he really know my situation now . I need to push him away from me . I need time to be friends with him as he knows my secret . And yet , maybe know that I love him . Tell me it’s all over now Never tease me Tell me that there’s no use anymore Make it easy Just when I’m about to get over you You keep appearing, shaking me up I still can’t forget you like a fool You don’t love me I know everything I turn away, I push you away...

Again today, I wear a smiling mask, Go outside, and pretend nothing’s wrong But I wanna run to you But I walk with slow step My heart is bruised And my body breaks down I'm on my way , forget him . It harder than I thought and I was trying to ignore those feelings . You know , the feeling of loving someone and waiting for him to tell the same way . It really hurts my heart . I cannot turn back time where I suppose met him for the first time , talked to him and our friendship become closer . But , I was regret . The moment he slapped me before , I should hate him . Hate him because he's doing that to me . He ruined our friendship that we're never ever talked again after that . I shouldn't forgave him a year after that . I should think first , and feel the pain that I get for still cared about him . And the most important , I shouldn't loved him . It was the biggest mistake that I have done in my life . And maybe it's true , this month is the en...

Cause you are my destiny  Don’t turn around and leave me,  don’t brush me off, don’t avoid me It was a coincidence , I stalked your facebook profile . I'm doing that for a long time , even when we're not close with each other anymore , Im still doing that weird stuff . Hrm , hai ? How are you ? I'm missing you so much . I really want to hear your voice . I still remember , the last day of school . I tried to see your face . In case you find out , I quickly look around . I'm afraid my heart will explode . And somehow , we managed to made eyes contact and yet I'm dying of seeing it . I'm too scared to do it before but I don't know how I gained an encouragement and energy to looked into your eyes . You know what ? I'm still thinking about our old days when you suddenly put some goldust on my face and ran away  with a big smile . I'm feel relieved that im alone that time and none of my friends being with me that time . It was a happy ending ...

 Hey all , it's been a while . I really freaking miss this blog . I got nothing to say , so I wanna show to u guys my anime drawing . It doesn't look that pretty and perfect but I am hoping that u like it .  

I never realize , never think of our friendship will be end like this . Totally . I feel lost and frustrated . For all the time , I being his truly best girlfriend . Now , we ended and being stranger . No more laughing , stupid jokes , sharing bout everything . It all gone . I couldn't understand what's in his mind right now . He rushed making choice , without telling me or saying anything . He never told me before . He never told me that he in love with my best girlfriend . I thought I knew he well . But , I was wrong . Why he didn't tell me the truth ? At least , I know that his heart captured by my best girlfriend . Now , I'm looking like a fooled , the last person who know that he's now in a relationship with her . My heart crushed into pieces . It never turn back to normal . I feel nothing but feels like betrayed by my own best friend . Did I done something that insult or making him uncomfortable ? Everything was fine . I'm not argued with him before th...

A girl who feel strong for her life . A girl who still waiting for someone that she could never have . A girl who listens to a sad love song when she get alone . A girl who refuse to let go of her heart for another guy that loving him . A girl that hide back her tears . A girl that who stare at other cute couple that date infront of her . A girl that get high hopes then hurt the most . A girl that tried to be the best to winning her crush heart . A girl that who secretly stalking her crush on facebook or at her real life . A girl that be her crush bestfriend so to get know what happenning at his life . A girl who listen when her crush telling his problems . A girl that act cool even when her crush told her that likes other girl . eventhough I'm happy for all this .. inside , I'm not fine . I'm not okay . :(

Let's talk bout ' Friend ' . You know what ? I have a very best friend from 3D and we always hang out together . Sometimes , I went to her house and she did the same too . We're always sharing everything , mostly bout our crush . She really a good listener and she always helped me out wherever I having a problems . She always try to makes me smile and trying to give me an advice . But now , both of us no longer get along . I don't know how should I react ? Did I make mistakes ? Or hurt her feelings ? Everytime I see her , she makes me doesn't even exist in this world . She act like she doesn't know me and makes me sad , she doesn't even want to see me . I'm sorry if I busy too much that sometimes I can't talk to you . Okay ? I'm having a problems right now and I really need some space and time to think about it clearly . So , I wouldn't make any mistakes again . I miss you , Evan . :')